Wednesday, January 23, 2013

She's Adorable, Deal With It!

 One thing that all new fathers need to know is that once your baby is born you no longer matter.

Oh, you need to be there to help take care of her when she needs you and you need to make sure that you don't screw things up too badly, but you're extra. You're superfluous. You simply don't matter.

Going to see friends?

"Where's the baby?"

Going out to dinner?

"That baby is adorable!"

Stopping by to see family?

"Give us the baby!"

Once your friends or family have their hands on the baby you stop existing. The baby is their world. Look at that cute smile, listen to that adorable cooing, watch her explore the world around her. Oh, they'll attempt conversation with you but you could talk about how you were riding a purple hippopotamus the other day and your friends will just politely nod as though they're listening, while cooing at the baby and trying to make her giggle.

Right up until this happens:

Then that baby is ALL YOURS. Suddenly you exist again.

Strange, huh?

1 comment:

  1. Yesterday, my in-laws babysat Vivian for the first time. They had her less than 2 hours, and during that timeframe she spit up, had a huge diaper blowout and then peed on my mother in law while she tried to clean her up...but they still want to see her more. Babies must be pure magic or something!