Sunday, December 30, 2012

Spider Baby!

Look out! Here comes spider-baby!

Me? I'm not Spider Baby! I'm Peter Parker....female baby version.

Friday, December 28, 2012

Drunk Baby

The pictures speak for themselves:

"I love you, man."

"I can TOO drive!"

"Wuzzat? Me no drinky. Drinky. Drink. Hahahahaha!"

"No ossifer. Jus' no."

Tuesday, December 25, 2012

Merry Christmas (Happy Tuesday)!

From all of us to all of you, Merry Christmas. If you don't celebrate Christmas then I still hope you have a happy Tuesday but that your Thursday is kind of inconvenient.

This was adorable 3.2 seconds ago.
If the holiday season has you pulling your hair out just remember that it'll all be over soon and you can mend your wounds in the coming year only to do it all over again next time.

We had a wonderful morning together opening presents and enjoying each other's presence. I hope that you can spend today with loved ones or doing something that you love. Maybe both.

Chillin' with some friends.
Lois isn't quite old enough to open her own presents so Mommy and Daddy got to tear into them. I'm hoping this trend continues because I really like opening presents.

"Happy 16th birthday, Lois! Daddy's going to open your presents for you!"

I doubt it'll fly but if I tell her her whole life that parents always open their presents for their children she'll have to believe it, right? As long as I get mommy, aunts, uncles, and grandparents to go along with it?

Nobody ever likes my ideas.

"Tonight that baby next door sleeps with the fishies. And I got a horsie!"
Lois got some great presents that I'd like to thank the senders for!

She really loved the crinkle wrap sent by Aunt Myra, the wrapping paper from Grandma and Grandpa Smith, and the box containing other presents from Gigi and Grandpa.

Thank you all, and Merry Christmas!

Saturday, December 15, 2012


We are currently in the middle of a car trip covering Ohio, New York, and the DC area, then heading back home. We're in Ohio now, enjoying our time with some friends, and the little girl has been fantastic!

Except for the part where she refuses to nap or be put down. That's been a little hard.

It's understandable. We're in a new place with people she's never met, with things she's never seen. She rode in the car for hours and hours the other day and so now she's cranky. She doesn't want to be put down for fear that we'll...I don't know...leave her behind? I'd never let that happen but how the hell is she going to know that? Right now when I say "Everything is okay Lois. Everything is fine. We love you Lois" what she hears is "blah blah blah Lois. Blah blah blah. Blah blah blah Lois." Maybe. She might also hear "blahblahblahblahblahblahblah." She doesn't seem to know her name yet. She reacts to a kissy sound just as readily as her name, which is to say every now and then.

Today we were at the house most of the day and Lois would NOT be put down. She would wake up, cry, throw a fit, and generally didn't allow herself to rest. Oh, she slept for 5 minutes here, 10 minutes there, but total I'd say she slept for thirty minutes where she normally naps for a good few hours during the day. The house was relatively quiet, very comfortable, and the setting was perfect for a nap but she told us in no uncertain terms that she was not tired.

Going out to dinner I expected her to be fussy and need a bottle. We were in a bar, the air was hot, the place was crowded, and it was noisier than even I usually feel comfortable being around.

She was sound asleep for most of dinner.

My little baby is confusing.

Tuesday, December 11, 2012

There's A Whole Wide World Out There!

Lois had her four month old doctor's appointment the other day and the doctor says our little girl is perfect. Now, we obviously already knew that but it's really nice to hear a medical professional say what we already knew. Perfect.

That's right folks. We're sorry. Your baby is inferior because ours is perfect. Medically stated, therefore it must be true. It's okay, I'm sure your baby is adorable too, just not perfect.*

That's right. I'm perfect.
She's started looking at the world around her and interacting with it. She went from "I have no idea what these things around me are" to reaching out and grabbing the world around her, not just batting at things like most babies do.

It's awesome.

I watch her play with the toys, grab my fingers or mommy's hair and it's great to see her realize that she can interact with things.

She's even started petting the kitty when he comes close enough to allow her to touch him. They have an uneasy truce; he says hi right up until her little fingers accidentally latch on to whatever part of his body they happen to be touching and she doesn't grab his tail if he keeps it away from her hands. It's a good truce.

The Baby-Cat Truce shown in action.
We owe Aunt Mel a huge thank you for Lois' new toy off of the baby gift list I put up a while ago because this little play mat has shown just how active our little girl has become. We received it yesterday and today our little girl is just going crazy playing with the crinkle toys, using her hands and her feet to grab them, swing them, and play.

Now that she's able to interact with the world around her I have to be a little more careful.

For example, the other night we had friends over for a party and I was having a beer. I looked over in time to take the beer bottle out of her hand but I swear the glint in her eye said "I'm gettin' some of that sweet, sweet, amber ale!" And then she watched as I took gulps from the beer that she had tried to get and she became angry at me, kicking me and crying. It was HER beer, not daddy's!

So now, on top of getting her used to solid foods (Oh, the poop...) I have to watch and make sure that my little girl doesn't make herself into a 5-month-old alcoholic.

Thankfully I can use that wonderful toy mat from Aunt Mel to distract her and in the meantime just give her some coffee instead.

*Parenthood is a competition, right? Where the person who makes their baby sound the most advanced and most perfect wins? Or am I doing that wrong?

Thursday, December 6, 2012

Pouty Pout Pout Face

Lois is getting even better at manipulating mom and dad into doing her will. She has not only mastered the art of "Crying So That I Get Attention" (she cries, and stops when someone LOOKS at her, then starts back up when anyone looks away) but has also learned the ultimate in pouty face.

How could you say no to this?

Can I have a pony daddy? Please?*

Lois Miriam Smith aka Little Miss Stubborn, aka Little Manipulating Sweety, aka Cockblocker

*Credit for this photograph goes to Grandma Pam who watched Lois for us last night while we went out on a date night. Credit, and a really big thank you!

Monday, December 3, 2012

Top 5 Reasons I Am A Horrible Father

5. I write posts like this one, or really this entire blog.

4. Sometimes I think things like "Just go to sleep little girl, daddy really wants to play this video game."

3. Sometimes I say things like #4 out loud.

2. I still call my babygirl "cockblocker," just quietly and not when other people are around.

1. I think this picture is hilarious because it's true: