Monday, June 17, 2013

Success Can Be Measured In Failure

To fathers newer than me or fathers soon-to-be, I have a little bit of advice that you're probably not going to like. You might even doubt it but trust me, I'm speaking as the voice of experience and you might benefit from this.

I'm supposed to wear it, right daddy?
You think you have the routine down, or you're pretty sure that you've figured out how to work this whole "feeding" thing, right? Maybe you've even found exactly how to put your baby to sleep at night so that he or she goes right to sleep without even a peep!


Tomorrow you'll find out just how wrong you are.

Oh, maybe not. Maybe your baby will continue to sleep perfectly when you sing them just the right song or feed them exactly 1 hour and 6 minutes before they sleep. Maybe the way you feed them without making any mess at all will continue to work.

But probably not.

Success today in any one thing does not mean success tomorrow. Babies are, apparently, still figuring out that they're human beings. Logic has no place in their mind.

I was celebrating having figured out how to keep Lois from making any kind of mess while spoon feeding her for the last week. I was doing great and things were going perfectly! I had this down, no problem, and feeding time would be perfectly easy from here on out.

Oh, what a naive fool I was back in those old days of yesterday.

I'm adorable. What else needs be said?
Outside of feeding let's say you believe you've baby-proofed your house. (HAH!) Well, let me tell you that your baby will find the things that aren't baby-proofed. Not only will she or he find them, she will want to stick them in her mouth.

So you'll just fix that and it'll be done, right?


Right up until they find the next thing that shouldn't be there and puts THAT in their mouth.

Now please pardon me. I was trying to think of a way to finish this but now I have to go stop my baby from reprogramming the DVR. She somehow pulled herself up so that she's level with it and is pushing all of the buttons.

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